Ellen Waldman

This special time of year is often when you’re feeling generous toward others. What actually is generosity?

In some translations of this word, it means “noble.” In others, it’s any action of giving what’s considered yours, without expecting anything in return.

Ed has always been involved in his local community. In fact, his yearly gifts to non-profit organizations and services totals around 25 charities. Some are familiar to you, like Access (https://accesshelps.org/get-involved) and Asante (https://asantefoundation.org). In addition, when Ed dies, he has designated about 20 individual friends and family members to benefit from his gifts. We would all agree that Ed is generous in sharing his financial resources. What’s also important to recognize is that generosity is more than money: generosity is an attitude.

“It’s not just about stuff and materialism. It’s about relationships, and the things that people do for you, and then the things that you can in turn do back for other people. This is something that is part of our human DNA,” said Sarah Schnitker, a psychologist at Baylor University. “It is a glue, in a sense, that holds us together.”

There are three ways to consider being generous. The first type of generosity is a material gift, and it’s the most familiar. This might be in the form of food, money, clothing and so on.

The next type of generosity is inspiration, or being of service to others. This is where volunteering comes in. It means giving time to those who can most benefit, like schools, churches and other worthy organizations.

A study was done that found when kids got help completing a task — in this case, finding a key to unlock a box of stickers — they were more likely to share their sticker reward with a new person. It’s that kind of behavior that shows gratitude is more than simple exchange. It can make us more generous with other people in general, even if they didn’t help us first.

The third type, often not considered as generosity, is fearlessness. While there are so many ways to feel judgmental and separate from others, here’s an option instead. This sense of generosity offers a reminder that others matter, that they are respected, cared for and secure. Simply, loved! Keeping fearlessness in mind, being honest and loving to others makes this expression of generosity available to everyone.

One practical way of showing generosity to loved ones is to create an ethical will as part of your estate plans. It has no legal bearing, but is a communication written for those who matter in your life. Here’s where you might share your wisdom and advice. Since there’s no formal structure to an ethical will, there’s no wrong way to write it.

Here are some ideas of what could be included in this ethical will, from the site Trust and Will (https://trustandwill.com/learn/ethical-will): Favorite thing, memories about your professional experiences and life, things you learned in life, recipes, photographs, experiences that shaped you, your values, what you believe in, and your hopes for your loved ones’ futures.

“Beyond charitable giving and volunteerism, generosity of spirit can be defined as a way of authentically being in and engaging with the world, free from fear, envy, and small-mindedness,” according to the website www.samaritancounseling.net.

While discussing this topic recently, a friend said that when she’s generous, it just feels so satisfying. Isn’t that the truth? Here’s to a year filled with this generous spirit.