ROGUE WANDERER: Dear Valentine — ‘Be Mine, or Else’

Published 7:00 am Thursday, February 13, 2025

Sweethearts brand conversation hearts represent a large part of my Valentine’s Day memory.

Although they taste like chunks of pastel colored sugar because that’s what they are, we received them and read them happily as gifts from classmates and friends. I even glued them inside Valentine cards for Mom and Dad. I’m sure they were appreciated and not eaten. In fact, while going through boxes of saved mementos, I have run across cards yet retaining their once-edible-now-smeared glad tidings.

The truth is, my great, great grandmother could have passed these venerable sweets around to her classmates. They’ve been around that long. Not the same ones, although … They produce new ones each year, but they may not need to if everyone recycled.

We can thank (or not) Boston pharmacist Oliver Chase for inventing the infamous sweet way back in 1847. He started by manufacturing a machine for making lozenges, then turned his business into a candy making concern along with his brother Daniel. He came up with a way to stamp messages on them using red vegetable dye. Their company became known as the New England Candy Company.

We know it better as Necco — the same name as the multi-colored candy wafers that come in a roll. By 1901, the lozenges had gone from soothing dry throats to facilitating romance. They became heart-shaped. Necco churned out eight billion candy hearts a year before finally cashing it in. But long live Sweethearts!

It once took nearly a year to make enough to satisfy every Valentine’s Day consumer. Now, the Spangler Candy Company in Bryan, Ohio, continues the tradition since buying out the defunct Necco in 2018. But they’re not newcomers to the candy scene either and have been a successful Ohio business since 1906 and in the same location. Spangler is also a major producer of candy canes, Dum-Dums, marshmallow circus peanuts, and Bit-O-Honeys, the last two being personal favorites.

Since the original heart messages, which were longer and somewhat odd compared with today’s abbreviated text-talk, they have been updated many times while still holding to some tried-and-true originals. I have come up with a line of hearts for defunct relationships and also-rans. Now, I’m neither cynical nor anti-romance. I think it’s a fun and temporary insanity.

But how about imprinting sincere messages like, “Be Someone Else’s,” “Meh,” “PU,” “Kiss a Pig,” or “Fly a Kite” (pair with “Over a Cliff”). Don’t you think so? OK, well these may be a bit on the fatalistic side.

I’m working at the Visitor Center in Jacksonville on Valentine’s Day, so feel free to drop by with a box of quality chocolates. You can keep the Sweethearts, forever. They’ll outlive you. Put them in a time capsule and in 100 years when they open it, they’ll say, “I wonder who stuck the Sweethearts in here?” Of course, the messages may have changed. I won’t go there.

Feb. 14 is another favorite holiday of mine — Quirkyalone Day. It makes no difference that I celebrate it every day. A big shout out to all my fellow single celebrants near and far.

Some may remember that I used to write columns for that other paper. Today, I celebrate the birthday of the RV Times, which saved my columnar bacon exactly two years ago. For them and their new owners, my heart messages would read “Beat Strong,” and “Be True.” So, now, I will share an edited bite from a former column written in celebration of the big day of hearts.

Lovers should celebrate with valentines, and make the most of one another. Romance is too grand and wonderful to be compacted into an annual expectation. Never mistake advertising fluff for the deeper magic. Romance dances on a bigger stage, it’s free to everyone, and there is no limit.

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